I'm that mom. The one who get's all weepy and emotional with the major (and even minor) milestones. I knew this day would bother me...just didn't realize how much. So I'm sitting here, Kate and Nick taking their morning nap, thinking about my little boy and wondering if he's still as sad as he appeared to be when Jason and I dropped him off a couple of hours ago to his new preschool. He was SO excited about this day...couldn't even get him to go to sleep last night (well...that's really not unusual). He woke up ready...excited to put his backpack on and ready to get in the car and go. When we arrived at his new school, he got out of the van and even said, "mom, I'll walk in like a big boy". He looked around and explored a tad while Jason and I were speaking with one of the teachers, even used the bathroom while we were there. When it was time to leave, I got down at eye level and told him he was going to have so much fun today. It was going to be water fun day and he was going to get to go in the sprinklers. He said, "mommy staying too?" I had to swallow the lump in my throat and choke back tears as his eyes clearly expressed his understanding that I was not going to stay and he was on his own. Jason and I turned to leave and I could hear him whimpering as we walked away...as a mom, all I wanted to do was turn around and cuddle him. I knew that was not what was best at the moment....but as soon as we got to the van, I let go and cried.
As Jason reminded me, it's a fact of life that he will be on his own many times in his life as he begins new adventures...as a mom, I just wish I was right beside him. I'm sure he's made friends already and is having a tremendous day...most likely not thinking about me at all. But I sure wish 3:00 would get here quickly because I'm thinking about him every single minute!
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